It doesn’t matter how rich you are loveSome of the little things they do can cause you to lose your temper.
Living with someone who talks at key scenes or chews at an excessive volume is not a good idea. EverThese tweets will remind you to change your toilet paper roll.
Here are 28 relatable and funny tweets about pet peeves in relationships.
My wife is upset that I did not put back the spices in their cabinet following her tested scientific method.
— Dan Regan (@Social_Mime) January 8, 2020
Husband: *completely and utterly silent*
-quiet dialogue scene-
Husband, I’d like to tell you the story of rockets.
— Sassparilla (@Megatronic13) February 25, 2020
Pretty sure my wife’s memoir would be called: “Oh my god, just take the extra 2 seconds and put it in the dishwasher.”
— Tired Dad of 2 (@Tired_Dad_of_2) September 16, 2019
How did my husband get me this wife?
— WTFDAD (@daddydoubts) May 24, 2019
My husband believes that it doesn’t matter if my husband whistles but not loudly, because I won’t be bothered as much.
— Cathryn 💚🧡💚 (@AngryRaccoon2) February 21, 2020
The season to be pissed off at your spouse for leaving their Kleenex in their pants that’s now in the lint catcher is upon us.
— Your Favorite Gay Mom🌈 (@lezzimomof2) November 8, 2020
My husband receives text messages approximately 35 times per hour, with an average of 1 reply per 5 texts.
Husband, after I put my phone down for 3 minutes and one “Hi” text from him goes unanswered:
HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! ARE YOU OK?
— Lady Lawya (@Parkerlawyer) September 12, 2019
My IUD provides me with 99% birth control effectiveness, but my husband’s dirty socks on the floor comes in at an impressive 100%.
— Maryfairyboberry🧚🏻♀️ (@maryfairybobrry) February 27, 2020
You are my blessing.
Husband: *sneezes again*
Me: I can’t live like this.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) May 11, 2021
Why throw it in the hamper when I can throw it on a chair that’s 2 feet away from the hamper.
– My husband
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) April 9, 2019
Me: Are you ready?
Me: great, I got myself and the kids ready and everything’s packed up and we’ll actually be on time if we leave right this second, let’s get in the car-
Husband: Okay, I just have to get in the bathroom quickly
— Momarazzi. (@Mirimade) October 27, 2018
I thought I was happily married & then my husband put the toilet paper on the wrong way.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) November 1, 2020
My wife loves to empty the dishwasher, put all the dishes on the counter and go. Then forget all the stacks of them jenga-style.🤦♀️
God bless me!
— TitsforTat 🏳️🌈 (@magicalchaos14) February 23, 2021
It’s basically about cleaning out the kitchen, then going away for two seconds, then returning to see the destruction of the kitchen again, and becoming super annoyed until the end.
— Mommy Owl (@Lhlodder) February 22, 2020
I have been married for 22 years and my top marriage tip is not to marry anyone who set his phones or alarm clocks at five minute intervals. Then, you will be able to snooze for at most an hour.
— 🇺🇸E.🇺🇸 (@YourMomsucksTho) September 3, 2018
I was thinking about recording an audio of me eating cereal, and clacking my spoon on my bowl to give to my wife to help her when she is in a fight.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) February 24, 2021
My superpower is asking rhetorical questions to my wife.
— Forward March (@RunOldMan) November 28, 2020
Sorry for the lateness, but my husband was forced to park 5 times in order to find a parking spot that he likes.
— Moderately Mom (@moderately_mom) November 10, 2019
My husband is a saint because he will still choose to share a bed with me every night, even though they want to show you how to use the dishwasher.
— That Mom Tho (@mom_tho) March 26, 2021
Your spouse is your constant companion, standing before the cabinet or drawer in the kitchen that you have to open.
— SpacedMom (@copymama) April 10, 2018
Me: Is it possible to go to that store?
Me: *gives him a grocery list*
Husband: *forgets several items*
Me: Is that the list you were looking at?
Husband (no, I didn’t forget).
— Jawbreaker (@sixfootcandy) February 18, 2020
My wife is furious when we return milk to the refrigerator with just one cup left. This, considering all the empty 96% shampoo bottles.
— Simon Holland (@simoncholland) January 14, 2020
My husband is the one who gets me to shout his name. His signature move involves not leaving toilet paper out in the bathroom.
— Jessie (@mommajessiec) July 28, 2020
If I became a ghost, I’d just be petty. Like throwing the bread at my husband’s head when he doesn’t close the bag and sprinkling his beard hair on his pillow when he leaves it all over the sink. And writing “Close the garage door” on the wall in blood.
— Momarazzi. (@Mirimade) July 9, 2018
After seventeen years, today is the day I finally tell my wife she’s been folding our bathroom towels wrong.
— Chad Read (@squirrel74wkgn) February 15, 2020
Did you ever get annoyed when someone rolled over on their bed?
Congratulations. You’re married.
— Sarcastic Mommy (@sarcasticmommy4) September 5, 2019
I’m at my most annoyed sitcom wife when I find out at the last minute that company will be coming for dinner.
— The Distracted Dad (@Distracted_Dad) December 9, 2017
In an effort to nag less, instead of complaining of my husband not flushing the toilet AGAIN, I just walked right up to him and said, “Your poop looks really normal today, you back on your probiotic?”
— Darlin’ Darla (@Darlainky) May 18, 2021